HBO announced today that a highly anticipated prequel to its hit series Game of Thrones will not be made due to a shortage of available penises to film.
“The casting call went out, and unfortunately only a dozen or so penises were qualified,” said co-creator David Benioff. “I told D.B. [Weiss] that if we were gonna do this thing, then the dicks would have to be bigger and better than ever. But that just isn’t the case.”
Benioff originally had a number of A-list penises show interest in roles on the show, which would have been titled House of the Dragon, but he was unable to secure a firm commitment from any of them.
“I tried to convince them that the penises could all be added in post-production, but they weren’t having it,” said author George R.R. Martin. “The network has been pushing them hard, but I’m glad to see they haven’t gone soft on their commitment to all natural dicks.”
At press time, HBO reported the prequel was back on after they negotiated a contract with an enormous dragon dick.