Just one day after thrashing the Thai World Cup team 13-0, an overly cocky U.S women’s soccer team launched an all-out military invasion of the Kingdom of Thailand.
“We felt pretty good coming off this World Cup victory, so I’m confident we’ll be able to defeat their army in the field and depose their political leadership without much trouble,” said striker Alex Morgan, who scored five goals in the game. “Their naval capability is formidable, but Carli Lloyd’s ball-handling skills will cut through them like a knife through butter.”
The American team was criticized for what many said was an unsportsmanlike lopsided victory. But the players say that is all part of the game that is geopolitics.
“When you’re hellbent on empire and conquest, you can’t let a little thing like ‘sportsmanship’ or ‘the Royal Thai Armed Forces’ get in your way,” said forward Megan Rapinoe. “It’s like they say, ‘soccer is hell.'”