Trump Declares State of Emergency Midway Through 3rd Chalupa Supreme

Trump Declares State of Emergency Midway Through 3rd Chalupa Supreme

WASHINGTON — Coming as a surprise to no one who has ever eaten one of the deep fried, cheesy, beef wraps, President Donald Trump declared a national state of emergency on Thursday midway through eating his third Taco Bell Chalupa Supreme with extra spicy Fire Sauce.

“It is time for Congress to do something about the horrible rumbling in my guts that these chalupas caused almost immediately after I consumed them,” said Trump just seconds before darting out of the press room clenching his stomach.

Within minutes, House Democrats and multiple states rushed to halt Trump’s declaration, stating that he overreached in trying to go for a third chalupa, and should have settled for a chicken quesadilla or something easier on the bowels.

“The idea that a state of emergency should be declared after a measly three Chalupa Supremes is a gross abuse of the President’s power,” said California Governor Gavin Newsom. “I have personally eaten four Cheesy Gordita Crunches in one sitting and pooped completely normal.”

WT Door contributed reporting.