5 Tips to Beat the Heat That Are All Being Less of a Pussy

5 tips to beat the heat that are all being less of a pussy - Schmedium

Summertime is in full swing and all over the country temperatures are through the roof! If you just can’t get inside to the comfort of your A/C, and you’re looking for a few simple ways to beat the heat this summer, stay cool with these 5 great tips that are all being less of a pussy.

1 – Be less of a pussy. Most people don’t even think about this before they step outside into the sweltering heat, but if you can manage not to be such a pussy then you’re sure to push through even the hottest days unscathed.

2 – Be less of a pussy. 9 out of 10 studies show that being less of a pussy makes you less susceptible to heat injury, dehydration, and being a soft ass little baby. Give it a shot!

3 – Be less of a pussy. You work in an air conditioned office and are literally outside for, like, the twenty seconds it takes you to get in and out of your car. Suck it up you little bitch!

4 – Be less of a pussy. Seriously? Millions of years of evolution allowed our ancestors to adapt sweat glands to hunt down wild game on the scorching plains of Africa, and now you’re complaining that Starbucks needs to turn their thermostat down an extra degree? Stop being such a pussy already!

5 – Be less of a pussy. If you haven’t gotten it by now, you probably never will. So just stay inside, you pussy.