Taking a hit of some of the empire’s finest Constantinople Kush, a local Byzantine man longingly recalled how he spent the entire year 420 A.D. getting totally blazed out of his mind.
“The Huns were everywhere, man, and I was just like, ‘Whaaaaaat?!’ You gotta chill, Attila,” recounted Maximus Chillicus IX. “Man, I must have been high, like, every day that year.”
Chillicus went on to express regret at how the scene has changed for the worse since then.
“Yeah, those were the days, back in the early empire,” he said. “I remember when a denarius bag still cost a denarius, and when you said you were gonna burn one it meant you were gonna burn down the whole village.”
At press time, robot overlord Dankbot 5000 was already making preparations to get super lit to celebrate the year 4020.